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It took until Sunday night’s game against the Patriots for me to finally figure out who the Jets are. Essentially, they are the equivalent of the KFC Famous Bowl. They are everything on the KFC menu thrown into a plastic bowl and covered with gravy. It seems awesome at first, and some bites will be delicious, but eventually you feel gluttonous and wonder why there’s corn in there.
We are officially in the second half of the season, and the Jets are wildly inconsistent. That’s who they are. Some games they seem like they can’t be stopped, other times they look like they should be playing for Andrew Luck. It’s pretty clear that even if they make the playoffs, they are just too erratic to sniff the Super Bowl.
Mark Sanchez is the epitome of inconsistency; he can complete a throw into tight coverage, but then give away pick-sixes like KFC gives away stomach-aches. The offensive line can dominate, but then let some guy named Andre Carter (4 ½ sacks) look like Lawrence Taylor.
I tend to blame offensive coordinator, Brian Schottenheimer, the most. His offense is like a church on the Jersey Shore, you can see it from a mile away. To beat the Jets, simply stop the run.
This Sunday, the Jets managed just two touchdowns, at home, against the league’s worst passing defense that’s plagued with injuries. Schottenheimer can’t take advantage of mismatches, and there should have been mismatches all over the field. Seriously, look at the Patriots box score. The Jets couldn’t beat a defense featuring names like T. White, J Tarpinian, K. Love, S. Brown, and P. Adams. At least I know who J. Edelman (1 tackle) is, and I know he doesn’t even play defense.
The defense is maddening for completely different reasons. They can be great, but then seem like they’ve never seen no-huddle before. But it’s one thing to be carved up by Tom Brady, it’s another to make terrible mistakes, like when Kyle Wilson didn’t get out of the huddle quickly enough to cover the wide receiver. Twice. That’s like eating a KFC Famous Bowl, and ordering another for dessert.
Rex may be the most inconsistent. Not his coaching, but his sound bytes. He’s had to apologize earlier this season for saying he’d have two rings if he coached the Chargers. Then on Sunday night, after a fan yelled, “Hey Rex, Belichick is better than you,” he rebutted with,
“Shut the f*** up.”
I’m not mad that he cursed at the fan, but he couldn’t come up with anything better? Where’s the man that told his team to “Get a G**damned snack?” If the Jets are to make the playoffs and make a run, it starts with Rex Ryan. But I have a feeling Rex is about to get us a G**damned snack, and it’s another KFC Famous Bowl.